Friday, October 13, 2006

The question isn't "are you crazy?", the question is, "to what extent?"

The more open I've been about my own mental illnesses, the more people I find who feel the same. We're all just a little bit nuts, some more than others. I really believed some of the things I've suffered with no one else (at least in my church) suffered with. I am very pleased to find out how wrong I am. Even people with more severe problems than me feel the same darkness.

I'm so emo.

I read an awesome book last night called, "The Worth of Every Soul" about a man who struggled for years with addiction, depression, and adultery. You read about his journey through excommunication and rebaptism and also his family's struggle as they stuck by him. It just brought me a little bit back to the realization that Christ really did descend below all things and knows exactly how we feel. All the pain, despair, and even feeling like God doesn't care (remember the garden?). He also rose above it so that he could help us do the same. We really can't do it on our own, we don't have to "prove" anything. We can only rise above it all if we use Him. I've learned and forgotten this so many times I can't count. But it never stops being true.

3 comments:

  1. I know just what you mean! (Particularly today... 'twas another doctor's appointment) I've actually started wondering who of my friends and family do NOT have a mental illness of some sort!

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  2. So true... Crazies: it takes one to know one, eh? :D

    No, but really. That's so true. I figure depression can either take you closer to the Lord or further away. You can't really stay where you are. And I struggle with turning to the Lord in my moments of darkness because I don't want to be the one who only falls to her knees when life seems hopeless. But it doesn't matter WHY we come back, you know? Only that we do. And even if we have to learn the lesson a gazillion times, He's always waiting with open arms.

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